Christy: [00:00:00] Hello, everyone. We want to welcome you. We’re so glad that you’re listening. I am Christy
Grace: And I’m Grace. You’re listening to the Thanks Mom Podcast
Christy: Great to be back again this week. And I think this is going to be the last time we’re recording together for awhile, right?
Grace: No, we’re going to
record two times next week. Yeah. We guys, we got, we got organized and scheduled recordings for finally the end of the summer. Yeah. So we’re going to get three recordings in before.
Christy: At
least. So, yeah. And then Grace. We’ll have to find out where Grace records this coming year. Last fall, you were recorded in the closet.
Grace: I’m not gonna have a big closet like that this year. I don’t know what I’ll do. Maybe I’ll go in the basement. I don’t know if it’ll be echoey. I won’t know til I go.
Christy: You might be able to like, create your own recording studio.
Grace: No, I don’t think so. Our apartment’s too teeny. I don’t know where I’d go. I’d probably just sit on my bed, put the headphones in.
Christy: Oh, come on. You got to
like, make it mysterious, like make [00:01:00] it
Grace: like, okay. I do have, I do have like a, what do you call it? When you pull the things in front of your closet and it shuts, what are those doors? The. Accordion doors yeah have an accordion door closet. I think. And maybe I’ll just sit in the bottom of that closet.
Accordion doors in front of me and record don don don! I don’t know,
guys you gotta create the mystery, the suspense, they can’t see it. So it’s like, yeah.
Gotta be last year. My, I don’t know if I ever fully described it, but my closet was right under the stairs. So like right at the top of where the stairs right under the stairs would be like right underneath where the top of the stairs would be. I can speak English. That was where the bar was to hang my clothes.
But then instead of just like ending the closet there, they just left the whole space underneath the stairs. Be. Part of the closet. Like they didn’t just shut it off. So then all of a sudden. You just had this weirdly like. Slanted space, but then I could go behind all my clothes and it would muffle it a little bit and sit on the [00:02:00] floor underneath.
As, I don’t know. I don’t know if that made any sense. Did that make sense? Underneath the stairs. Yeah, it’s just, yeah. That’s why we said it was Harry Potter. I don’t know, we might’ve taught. We did. Underneath the stairs. Yeah. That’s the closet underneath the stairs really well, but he was, and then I.
And then I got the. Harry Potter poster, which I am, I am bringing it back to school.
Christy: So saying that it should just be
like a permanent staple in your recording studio, wherever you go.
Grace: My platform nine and three quarters poster?.
Christy: Yes
exactly. So, yeah. All right, Grace, bringing back the funny stories. Putting you on the spot.
I’ll share mine first. While you think. So Sophia, my youngest got her first haircut yesterday. This girl is such a diva. So drama. I she’s like for like three and a half going on 13. That’s what I always say. It’s just, it’s a little much for me at times they will just say. Everybody’s like, she’s so cute. She’s funny. She is. She is my joy.
Which my friend Kim told me she would be. Almost about four years ago. [00:03:00] So, but my heavens, she did not want her haircut. She’s been telling us. Probably for six months, anytime my boys go to get theirs, I don’t want my haircut. I think she’s really hung up on the cut word. So we started calling, it sounds like it’s going to
be painful.
Painful. Never had a haircut. Of course.
You have literally a cut kids, take everything literally. And when you’ve cut your knee
Grace: before, so it’s like, ouch. Cut my hair. Yeah.
Christy: So I stopped calling it a haircut and we went to the hairstylist. I should’ve said that. The word though.
I kept started. I started feeding her the beauty parlor and the beauty salon. So that’s where we went yesterday was to the beauty parlor or the beauty salon. And she was so excited could not even sleep the night before. And which was good because it finally moved in that direction. And then we get there and she totally freaks out because there’s someone in front of us, you know, we got there a little early and getting her hair like blow dried and the noise. So if we just take that like freaks out,
Yeah. So then she’s like, [00:04:00] no, I’m not doing this. And she’s just like freaking out. No. So after, you know, probably an hour, cause I brought three of the kids plus myself and we’re all going through that. So we’re like, okay. You know, going through each thing. And. Each of the kids get done. So finally we got her to sit on Ava’s lap and then all of a sudden it became fun because I was like, let’s just give her a sucker.
Just give her sucker now. And then she sat there, then she thought it was so cool. And she kept telling us all how she how, you know, my hairstylist kept like misting my hair. And you do this. Well, the funny thing is she’s got, Sophie has got some funky hair. She’s got all this new growth. Ringlets I think her hair’s going to eventually be curly like underneath.
But the stuff on top has grown way faster. So we actually had to give her a hairstyle of trying to layer it. So it would lay right, because she had
Grace: straight hair on top of curly hair
Christy: underneath that you could see through, cause it’s still like wispy baby hair. So we actually had to frame her face and layer the hair in the back for, I mean, and so.
In between [00:05:00] all the rest of the haircuts and finishing up, like finishing up Ava, finishing up Peter finishing up me. We kept retouching up and cutting more of her hair and we would just have her stand there. And my hairstylist is so great. Kimberly so good. Like she just like touches up this and that. And she goes, she’ll never know what a real haircut is. Cause she kept coming back in. And so in Sophie’s mind, she got like four haircuts.
Then we leave. And she got another sucker at the end cause she was so good. So don’t judge. I know I gave my kids two suckers before lunch. She gets in the car and she’s a total. On the way home because she was hungry and starving. And she was so cranky and then we get home and she’s like,
Grace: I went to the hairstylist and she.
And she was so happy and I was like, wow, mom, she seemed to love it. And you were like, oh no,
Christy: It’s been pure drama all morning. Hated it so excited was so mad, so excited. And then last night she was all mad that we weren’t going back to the hairstylist today. So. I was just like total face Palm. Like [00:06:00] I’m like, I don’t know how to do.
Grace: Well, and I came home because they had put a, she put a little product in it, so they all curled together. But then you swim in the pool. And so it’s just the bottom over here that just was like nicely, evenly curled. So then those bottoms of your hair get wet in the pool. And afterwards I was like, can I see it now? Cause I wanted to see it now that it was her natural hair. She goes.
Yeah, the stuff’s all gone now. Back to normal or something like that. She was like, it’s back to normal now.
Christy: It’s something for her. I think I’ll put a little gel. She’ll think it’s fun. Maybe we’ll make our own. Well shooting parlor
Grace: here. Come down, I’m doing my makeup or just face wash in the morning.
And I’ll just give her like a little squirt of whatever it is or I’ll just give her a brush and she just she’ll just keep going along. It’s so funny. It is one time I did give her something with a little powder on it. I didn’t realize how aggressively she’d put on her face. And so you just see like random streaks of pink across her face.
And I was like, I shouldn’t have brushed that. I mean, it comes off with a little water, but. I’m just like, oh, you actually put that. Yes
Christy: exactly. She does. So it’s hilarious. Anyway, so that was my funny story of how [00:07:00] dramatic she is. She just has a huge flare for the dramatic. Yeah.
Grace: Well, I think she looks up to her.
Sisters. And so she’s trying to be like us. Oh, yeah. You know, and were, but she. But yeah. So trying to have our drama in her little world. Yeah. Okay. My funny story, isn’t quite as. Long of a story, but I went me and Gracie, my good friend, Gracie hung out at her grandparent’s cottage just for the day, this week.
Just to have, like like, we, I called her. I was like, we should plan on that this summer. This was way back in may, because I want to just have a day. I’m just doing nothing and just hanging out with. I was like, oh, Well, we’ll figure it out. And so we figured out just the two of us to go.
And we like it. We had no plans. We bought some food and drinks and stuff, and just like sat on her grandparents’ pontoon for a bit. Eventually took it for a loop around lake. We swam, we just sat in chairs. Like we just did nothing. Like she was like, what do you want to do next? I was like, I don’t know. Like we just.
Oh, I’m so glad around, but we’re sitting at one point. They like her grandparents have two chairs at the end of their dock. So we’re [00:08:00] just sitting there chatting, like looking out on the lake, like right after. We’re like. Just finished dinner and we’re like, we need to digest before we drive home because we can, because we’re not in a rush.
And we’re just, I don’t know, chit chatting and all of a sudden she like. I don’t remember how we got talking, but she pointed to like one new scar. And she was like, that was the thing from earlier this summer she’s like, she’s like, that was the thing from earlier this summer. And I tripped and she had shown me one scar before that. I don’t know. She, I don’t know how we got on the topic of scars.
But all of a sudden. Really, I guess a bunch of the scars that we have. We realized we were there. Yeah. It’s just like random. I don’t even know how it started. And all of a sudden we’re like looking at random parts. Like I had one on my hand where I was like, do you remember this retreat? When we were doing this skit
and then we’re and then I got scratched and then there’s this like scab and dah, dah, dah. I was like, do you remember that? That’s what this scar is from. And then I was like, all of a sudden I paused and looked at her. I was like, what are we doing? We’re talking about scars and like telling the story behind.
It was just such a weird topic. I was like, we’ve been friends for too long and we’d gotten through all the deep topics. I think that [00:09:00] day that we got to like, so we’re talking
I was like this one on my knee. I don’t remember when it happened, but it’s been there since I was a kid.
Christy: You can tell the depth of your relationship. When you can talk about
Grace: scars. Yeah, and it just seemed normal until like five minutes. And I was like, what are we doing? It’s just, that’s so funny. I know.
So, thanks Gracie for talking about scars with me. There you go. It was just so random. And weird. And I was like, I’m glad we’re not weirded out by this.
Christy: So anyway, we wanted to.
Grace: We’re having a part two for the first time.
Christy: Yeah. We’re kind of excited. Like we feel like established podcasters. But like part two, we revisit, so yeah.
We want to go back into talking about. Freedom. From our previous episode. Because we felt like there was so much more, you could delve into in different aspects and. I don’t know, it came up so often for us this week,
Grace: basically, because I just kept coming to you stressed. And then you’re like, remember what we talked to talk about on our podcast and be like, [00:10:00] and then you continued on. And then it was like,
We have so much more we could say on this so basically me being stressed this week led to another podcast. Well, it wasn’t.
Christy: I , yes and no, because there was things, even once we were done, I felt like we had just like hit the tip of the iceberg. And we talked about last time when we. If you look at our freedom episode,
That came out. It was just last week from when we recorded it. But depending on when you’re listening to these And we talked a lot about freedom within like the parameters and how our faith and our church actually gives us the, these parameters for protection. And there’s such a wide birth within that.
For freedom and how that’s not there too. As a discipline or to. Be restrictive as much as it is to give us life to the full, like John 10, 10 says, you know, I’ve come to. That you may have life and have it abundantly or have it to the full in that way. And we talked, yeah, basically about that was pretty much the [00:11:00] recap of how there’s freedom within those boundaries.
That shouldn’t be there to restrict us, but to give us life and joy, and that we have choice in how to experience that freedom and have choice to see how to look at that. So that was. Right. you’re good with that recap pretty much. Yeah. Yeah. And we, and how that applies in many areas of our life and how we can view it.
So this week, we were just talking more. I think about. Freedoms. Specifically. That was a weird word
Grace: specifically. Yeah.
Christy: Specifically. In talking about decision-making and. How. God guides us in either discernment or how to make decisions and the freedom that’s given in just doing the will of the Lord. Yeah. And I know that’s like, you’re all out there going well, duh, like that’s what we’re supposed to do, you know, to know, love and serve the Lord with all our whole heart, soul, mind, and strength. And.
Yes. [00:12:00] And that seems very daunting at times, but grace and I’ve had a lot of good conversations over the past. Year or more. That really, that is so freeing. To just go, no, my job is just to follow God’s. Will. I don’t have to overanalyze this. I don’t have to overthink this. And I think our humanness gets in there so much in the overthinking and the over-analyzing because we’re, we’re so nervous. What if we get it wrong? Right.
I say this to grace a lot that God is not here to dupe us. Our God is not a God. Of duping. Our God is a God who got on the cross and stretched out his arms and said, this is how much. I love you. And then gave up his life. For us. And unlike many other, you know, people say they’re gods, you know, of whatever you look at. Like even the old Testament, like.
Our God is the [00:13:00] God. That actually is the only one that came down to earth and took on human form and suffered and lived among us. He’s not here to dupe us. So it’s not like when we have decisions that God is like trying to hide the truth for us, for us to go on like this treasure hunt and be revealed.
Like it may be something. That? Yes, it requires some sacrifice and some Discernment and prayer, and that God wants to draw us into deeper relationship to His will but I think grace and I got talking a ton today. We’re like, we should’ve just recorded earlier today.
Grace: And then we just said the whole podcast, basically.
Christy: We need to go. Record this, but. My point that I was, you know, bring up to grace. I said, well, we really need to talk about that. God is not hiding from us. He gives us steps for discerning and. When we follow that, it’s so freeing like this isn’t rocket science. This is very simple.
Do the will of the Lord. And the Lord will [00:14:00] make it apparent to you. Yeah. And, and, and I’m not talking about neon signs, I’m talking about. Like direction in terms of. The doors will be opened or they’ll be shut. And you just walk by faith. Into that, or it’ll, he’ll use different things in our life to move them. So
I think that we can just make so much anxiety and worry. When we should actually be going, if I know I’m in the Lord. And seeking his will then I need to trust that he’s going to direct my paths. And that’s going to be made clear to me. So that’s what I want to kind of dive into with some different examples today.
Yeah. Yeah. So I was listening to father Ricardo yesterday on the Al Kresta Podcast and the biggest thing that he said that struck out that the tidbit. Al Kresta it’s on. Is it a podcast? It’s a radio show on EDW, TN. [00:15:00] Catholic radio.
Grace: Just curious, sorry. Sidetracked.
Christy: And. He father John Ricardo said that faith.
And I missed who he said to find it, if it was Pope Benedict or if it was, I think it might’ve been Chesterton. But that he.
That he said that the definition or a definition of faith. Way to look at it. Is that. We are leaning so much on God. Faith is leaning so much on God that if God were not there, we would fall over. And that just really struck with me. And I’m like, do I live like that?
Am I, you know, Looking at faith that way and trusting so much that. God’s just, I know God’s going to be there. He’s not going to abandon us, but I need to have faith that much, that I’m leaning that much on them. That if he were there, I’m that unbalanced that if he stepped away, I would just fall.
Yeah. That was really [00:16:00] striking to me. Yeah. And that same thing. Then this morning I woke up and part of my devotional was. That. Turn your anxiety and worry. Into a prayer. That that is how we show trust. Like that’s the sacrifice that our anxiety and worry are not from the Lord. So if it’s causing us anxiety and worry, we need to take it to God to surrender it.
And turn it into prayer of trusting. And I felt like those piggybacked so much on. This freedom and that’s what we’re called to do. That’s it? Lean over so much on the Lord that you’re going to fall over. If for some reason he wasn’t there, which we know is never going to happen. And that when we find ourself trusting, not trusting that when we’re worrying and anxious,
That should take us right to prayer. To turn into surrender and trust. And then. Be free. Be free in your trust and in your faith that God will direct you. That made me think. The feast of St. Maximilian Colby was on Sunday this past Sunday. So when our last [00:17:00] episode came out And so one of my friends shout out to Gabrielle, one of my friends from Poland.
Sent this quote. From Maximilian Kolbe that I feel like, kind of. Is similar to what you’re saying. I like trusting so much. That you’d fall over or how we were talking last time too, about. Just. Just like letting go, like. It’s not a risk, it’s a trust fall kind of thing. Okay. This is Maximilian Colby. Whenever you feel guilty, even if it is because your car, you have consciously committed a sin, a serious sin, something, you have kept doing many, many times.
Never let the devil deceive you. By allowing him to discourage you. Whenever you feel guilty, offer all your guilt to the immaculate without analyzing it, or examining it as something that belongs to her. My beloved may every fall, even if it it is. Serious and habitual sin always become for us a small step toward a higher degree of perfection.
In fact, the only reason why the immaculate permits us to fall and secure us from our self conceit. From our pride [00:18:00] to make us humble and thus make us docile to the divine graces. The devil instead tries to inject us in discouragement and an internal depression in those circumstances, circumstances, which is in fact, nothing else than our pride surfacing. Again.
If we knew the depth of our poverty, we would not be at all surprised by all our falls, but rather astonished. And we would thank God after sinning for not allowing us to fall even deeper and still more frequently. And that’s the quote. I just like the kind of like using like, just let it go. It’s not yours. Like even letting go and be like, don’t even just be like, yep, that was wrong. Don’t even, I like the.
Without analyzing it or examining it. Offer all your guilt to the immaculate. You know, and it was just that kind of, that freedom of like, even in sin, you can be free. Right. Like, just let it go. And it’s a, it’s a humbling thing because it’s saying thank you for letting me learn from this. Like that’s why you let me fall.
But the devil’s the one who wants to analyze. You know? Yeah. [00:19:00] Right, because then we fall in that, that trap of scrupulosity. If we’re not letting it go, like that’s a trap that the devil plants they’re like, oh, we should Harbor. We should wallow in the sin. Of we’re so bad and we’re so scum. But when we let that go and just are humble enough to say, yep, I messed up God.
Forgive me. Take it to the blessed mother and then pick ourselves off and try again. That’s allowing that’s actually humbling and being self less, not selfish to be. Able to go before the throne and say, okay, now help me. Help me again. And because I’m not perfect and I’m going to mess up again, but I’m, I am trying, I’m trying to improve. I’m trying to better myself.
And so I think, when we say the freedom. I don’t want to say that all of this is so easy. No, that’s not what I’m trying to say. I’m saying that we get at the fact that it is this simple, though. It is simple. So not simple in terms of always easy, but simple [00:20:00] as in, this is what we need to do. And the Lord we need to trust and have faith that the Lord will direct us. And so that’s when, you know, people are like, oh, direct us, like neon lights and signs. And, and that’s not what I’m saying either. I’m saying that.
There’s different processes. In terms of decision-making like we take it to the Lord. And I loved this. I was listening to some content in our masters program that I’m part for in made for greatness. And we were talking. Focusing this summer on the holy spirit and the, you know, the gifts of knowledge and wisdom and counsel, we’re going through all of those. And we’re discussing about when we don’t know what to do. Like decision-making like, how do we know how to approach the situation? And.
I loved the response was we take it to prayer, but if then if God isn’t like speaking to us and we’re a lot, you know, we’re in a place of silence and and it can be just something simple and an immediate prayer. And if we, but if we are in a place that we’re in tune with the spirit and taking that, like genuinely like saying, okay, holy spirit, what do you want me to do in this [00:21:00] situation?
Like this is an immediate need. Or even if it’s a more complex need that we’re praying about and taking to prayer. That it doesn’t mean that we’re not hearing the holy spirit when we don’t hear anything. Like some of that. In discernment is just. God’s saying you are in tune to me enough and seeking my will. That no matter what you do.
I am going to honor and bring fruit from that. I mean, that’s just biblical, like. In all things, God works for the good, for those who are in Christ Jesus, like he’s going to use those decisions. So I think a lot of times we think, well, I don’t have an answer. The neon light didn’t come. I don’t know what I’m supposed to do when it’s like, well, no, in the sense, these are both equal, morally they’re equal. If you live in a dorm next year for campus, or you live in a apartment,
in the grand scheme of things. It’s not, it doesn’t matter. And God’s going to use those both for his glory in your life. If you’re seeking him. And that’s where the trust and faith comes in. [00:22:00] So first I think we take it to prayer. Right?
We were talking about this. Grace had some decisions this week. And I was saying, okay, look at this. So this isn’t, if this isn’t clear, you can explain that you said you took it to prayer for a day.
I had like two things that I was. I thought it was kind of cool parallel two things. I was trying to make a decision on. And I knew that I knew what I wanted. But I was like, it felt convicted. I was like, but this is something I should bring to prayer because this shouldn’t just be a me decision.
And so I brought both to prayer for one. I really did feel no. Like the Lord, not saying either which way. And so in that he was like, just make, you can go with your decision and I’ll bless that. And so I was like, okay, I’m moving forward with that. The other one I kind of just felt unsettled like one day in prayer like.
I don’t feel like the Lord’s calling me either which way, but I also don’t feel like I should just. Move on either. Like I was like, I’ll just pray about it another day. I’ll come back. I was praying about it yesterday. And I didn’t get into this when we were talking about podcast topic too, but also some of it was just like,
I’m so glad that you would, you would humble yourself to say, this is what [00:23:00] I want. I could just do that, but I’m, I’m asking you, if you want me to do something else, you were asking the Lord. Yes. Me asking the Lord, this, and he was like, I’m so honored that you would give me that option. Like he’s like you could, or even like that. You’re humbling yourself to, if I tell you to do the opposite of what you want.
You are still, even though you know that you’re weak and you’re worried, you won’t do the opposite. You’re coming to me saying I will like, I’m giving you the option to tell me. Right. You’re going to be obedient. I didn’t tell you that, like, it was just kind of like just even in being open. That is, that was just so honoring.
Thank you. And then I felt kind of just like A real indifference in the way I did for the other one where it’s like, you can make your choice, but also kind of a conviction of like go seek the counsel of others, which I had about this to a few, like a few friends and to dad. And I was like, but I haven’t talked to mom about this. We’ve just been busy. So I was like, all right.
If mom doesn’t, you know, like kind of almost being like, go, go seek my. My answer for what you should do through other people. [00:24:00] And I’ve had that before, where I don’t know what I, what I think the Lord is saying, but then he speaks to me through three people that I. That are in authority over me or that I, that I see that I can go to for advice. Right.
People that have had wisdom or have a track record of speaking into this. And I very much have for years seen that as that’s the Lord speaking through them. Right. That is my answer to prayer. He, I might have not heard in my head or something like during a prayer time, like do this, do that, but just through the wisdom and advice of others, it’s like, okay, this is how I make a smart decision. Right. And that is just as much the Lord. And so it’s kind of like,
You know, just go confirm what you want to do through asking your mom advice. Cause you’re the only other person that I would go to for advice that I had it. And. You kind of were in line with what other people said. And I was like, okay, then I’m going to carry forward with what I was , I already wanted to do.
And I’ve, you know, but it was just kind of that like,
Yeah, this is just going to the Lord and being like, do you care either which way? But I’m bringing this to you and I’m trying, and I’m. I’m trying to fall into the freedom, especially for the [00:25:00] decision that I went to people for advice more for. I was like, I really know what I want to do. And. And I, I could just do that, but I’m, I’m choosing freedom right now of like, even though I don’t see how.
The opposite of what I want to do could work out. If you really wanted that from me, you would make it work right. If you were actually calling that. Calling me to that then you would make it work right. Just fall into place. And I think. That I’m having, but I had to choose that trust. Cause part of me was like, I could just grasp and control
control the situation right now. And it was like, really like almost nerve wracking and prayer. I was like, I’m scared. You’re going to say the opposite right now. And I really don’t want to do that. And I’m also scared that I would just deliberately disobey you and be like, Nope. I know you just said that to me. I it’s clearly understood to me in prayer.
But I don’t want to, and I’m just going to go the other way. Like right. But it was like, I’m going to choose to trust that I would. It would just be the right decision in the end. And I don’t know, I think that’s a great example of trusting and then the freedom that comes from the Lord. [00:26:00] Using our willingness and our obedience.
And to see how freeing that can be. I mean, that’s what. Gain’s trust and gains go, okay, God was faithful there. God’s faithful here. And we build up that trust with God, but it comes to us being free and willing to do that. And so going through this process, so first we pray and we. Take it to the Lord.
If we’re not sure, and we’re not having that true direction, that there’s a freedom in that of just choosing. And then we trust God that he’s going to either he’s going to direct our path through either. Opening doors, closing windows, or then. Maybe you’re not sure of that and making that decision. So then it’s very biblical that we, it says to seek the council.
Of many. And then, and that’s not everyone because that can be overwhelming, but many isn’t wise counsel. And who do you trust and who has given you. You know, faithful. And fruitful wisdom in the [00:27:00] past, or has experienced in this area. And in this area a good track record. So in this instance with grace,
She didn’t tell me what her father had already said to her. And then, so I was like, you know, this is really up to you, but how do you see it’s going to work? So here she comes seeking counsel. Cause she’s like, I feel like I should be checked on this again. So she went from prayer. To seeking counsel.
And then the direction I actually gave her was beside it’s up to you. I said, how is this going to work in your life? How is this practically going to work? And so now we’re not even in a sense of. A spiritual discernment where we’re going. Okay. If, if we say yes to this situation, What would that look like?
And this was for her. It was about taking on another commitment of something. And I said, okay, so where’s your you just got hired for a job. You want to volunteer at this place. You’re head of this club, you’re leading another organization. Oh. And by the way, your main job is to be a student.
So have you put this on paper? Have you blocked out all this time? Do you have any more room? [00:28:00] So let’s say she does have more room. Cause we went through that process. Always have more until you hit 24 hours. I always have more. It’s technically fair. Technically we could say I have, but then. So we can always say yes, because that was the other thing she’s like, this is a good thing to do. And her dad right away spoke up and said, just because there’s good things to do doesn’t mean we should do them.
You know, and we hear that a lot that. We end up spreading ourselves thin. I have. An an eighth grader right now who wants to do everything and] anything. And I, the advice I’m giving to her is just because you can doesn’t mean you should. And we need to look at, if we’re committing to this. And we’re doing it all. Are we doing any of it? Well,
So that was what I came back to grace and the, and the wisdom of that and letting the holy spirit move in that and the freedom of going okay now it’s not just me making a decision if I should or not. It’s me looking and going. Is this even feasible? And if it’s feasible, does that mean, then I’m doing everything to the best of my [00:29:00] ability.
And if the answer there is no, then we need to go, what needs to be cut because your vocation for you, grace right now as a student and to show up well in that. And I took the same example with decisions and put it back in my own life as a vocation, as a wife and a mother. And I’ve been convicted this last year for myself.
Of. If I’m not taking care of myself. ’cause a lot of times we talk about, oh, self care or that quiet or that silence, or just needing a little retreat for yourself or a little time away, or, you know, just to read the book you want to read or to go on a walk. And everyone’s like, oh, I don’t have time. I don’t have time to do that. Or to take a nap or to take a bath.
And everybody’s like, oh, that’s selfish. Like that’s wasting time. And I would challenge anyone out there to say, no, that’s not. Because if I don’t take those times, if I don’t take the time for exercise, if I don’t take time for prayer, but I don’t take time for relaxation and rejuvenating myself.
I show up [00:30:00] poorly to my vocation. Because I am not in my best form. And actually that’s very selfish. Because it’s selfish for me to not show up. In my best form to fulfill my vocation, to my husband and to my children and to do that means I need to be taking care of myself. And so that’s where the enemy gets into and like, oh, if you’re thinking of you, that means you’re, you’re no, that’s all selfish and that’s on you and your job should be always serving and for other people, and you’re in a vocation of service of marriage and to your family.
But how are you showing up to them? If you’re not showing up with a full tank because you’re not taking that time away to be recharged and rejuvenated. Then actually you’re by not doing that because you think that part and to rejuvenate is selfish. It’s actually the opposite. And it’s being selfish by showing up.
Not being able to do anything good. So I think we really have to look at that and the freedom that comes from the practicality. So taking the next [00:31:00] step in the decision-making of, okay, if we can do this, how does this practically look and then weighing it in our schedule, weighing it and our vocation.
Will I be able to show up to that and there’s freedom where it, then it takes it off you. Cause here I am seeking the Lord. I’m going through these steps. I’m listening to the holy spirit.
And, and that part of what is God telling me to do in this situation? You saw that with your other. With your other decision. Of where you were thinking you started having to make the decision about the speaker. You’re talking to. And making it soon. Like sooner and you hadn’t gone through all those steps yet? Well, it wasn’t quite a decision or anything, but it was more just.
Discernment I don’t know. Well, you were trying to think like should, I have to make it. You later on, I was more of a, I. I was at a waiting period, but anticipating like I’m going to have to help. Organize something in the future. Like. Anticipating, how do I do that? Well, Well organized.
Do [00:32:00] it? No, I. That was what I was clearly saying. I was like, I’m not going to not do this. I’m going to, that’s what I kept saying when I came to you. Well, because there was some dissension of feedback you were getting, but my point on this was that. You hadn’t gotten all of the information, like it wasn’t fully in your court. And by going then, and when I said back to you, like.
What have the other people said, what does the advisor said? And then once you got that information, It all the sudden it became very freeing because you’re right. It wasn’t your decision to make it was in the hands of others. But the, the fretting and the worrying that of your anticipation was coming because we hadn’t fulfilled the process of looking at the practicality side.
So I think a lot of decision-making. Happens. It can happen on its own by have we gotten all the information? Do we have, do all the information that we need to make a well-formed decision? And sometimes. Once we get all that information we realize it’s not even our decision to make. And the decision gets made for us.
Like in that situation. So that’s what I was trying to use. [00:33:00] That example as. In terms of Just going through all of those steps. Yeah. So in. And using like those three steps in terms of like prayer, listening to the holy spirit, seeking the counsel of others and then going through the practicality of it. I think there, we, we start to experience like, oh, there is freedom because all I’m doing is the will of the Lord. And he we’re letting these other things within the discernment.
And decision-making. Help guide that process of doing the will. I’m still in his will still seeking it. Still praying, still listening to the spirit, following biblical scripture of counsel and wisdom of practicality, and then God guides that. By opening these doors, shutting these windows, you know, that type of thing.
Kind of all comes back to like, kind of what we said last week of just, you can just be. And I was reminded of that. I got to go to adoration this morning, filled a holy hour for someone. And I remembered way back to the, there’s the revival retreat that blessed is she put on. [00:34:00] Last year.
And I remember they went around with Jesus in the monstrance. In front of each individual woman. and right A few rows before father got to us with the monstrance. I remember the speaker saying like, you don’t need to have something to say or something, or you don’t have to show up a certain way or anything. Like when Jesus comes to you in a few minutes, like.
You can just be, he’s not expecting you. He’s not expecting anything of you, like in a freeing way, kind of just, I can just sit here and look at him and I don’t have to, it doesn’t. I don’t know, I don’t have to prepare something specific. Right. And so that kind of came back to mind this morning when I was in front of the Eucharist again.
And that kind of came back to this where some of these decisions it’s like, I don’t have to do anything. I’m just showing up. And it’s like, Hey, what do you want me to do? And, and then I just continue with that. Or, you know, some things like you’re saying, sometimes it’s not even in your power and you might be considering something or worrying about something, but it’s not.
You just have to be, you just have to show up like, And he’s not. [00:35:00] Waiting for you to say or do something perfect. Because I was, I was groggy, I hadn’t had my coffee when I went to adoration. So I was like, I feel like I’m not. I’m trying to think of something to say, and that’s when it kind of came back. It’s like, I’m just glad you’re here. Like yeah.
You know, especially that you didn’t come even later because you waited to make a cup of coffee, like. Because I was running late and I was like, I’ll be fine without another, for another hour without coffee. But it was hard. I was like, oh my gosh. Well, I think that’s the beauty of adoration is I’m just always struck by how much we think we’re coming to adore and to worship. And that is true.
But, and where people are like, just gaze upon the face of jesus, you don’t need anything. But I love when we reversed and go and Christ is just like, no, I’m glad you’re here because I get to gaze upon you. And I see you as beautiful. And I see that you are beloved and you are mine and you are here.
And I’m actually gazing upon you. And we think it’s all on us to do something and no, the Lord is just asking us to be there. And. I think [00:36:00] we need to give ourselves some grace and a break to think that well, one to humble ourself to think that we really have any control. Yeah. And that’s what it kind of came down to. It’s like, you’re not going to change anything that happens in prayer. Just be like, you’re just supposed to show up. Like, and mother Theresa, I think said something like that. Like it’s more about showing up every day in prayer. It’s not about what you say or what you do in prayer.
It just shows that you’re there. Right. And like you were saying about the sin thing with Maximillian Colby and, and recognize that and humble and show up that you’re trying again. We, we really our lack of trust comes from the fact that we think we can do better than God. And we can control. And I guess the whole point of this second part for me is to challenge us to say no,
The fretting, the worry, the anxiety that comes because of our lack of trust thinking we have control is almost laughable. It is probably laughable by the Lord, but I think he’s loves us more than [00:37:00] that. That he’d be more humbled not to laugh at us, but to say no, just come enjoy my freedom. Come enjoy the freedom of just sitting and resting in me.
And letting me direct your life by just saying, and allowing me to do my will in your life. Stop trying to control these things that are just out of your control, that we really can’t do any better. Then God at all, like it’s such a drop in the bucket. And once. And we, and we have to daily lay that before the Lord. That’s not easy. That’s human that we want to feel like we have some type of control, but we really don’t.
And so our trust. Needs to come by turning that anxiety and worry. Into prayer surrendering once again, saying I messed up once again, Lord, and I’m trusting you and I’m going to lean so hard on you. That if you are not there, I’ll fall over. That is the faith I have in you that you’re just going to direct my path and I’m just going to [00:38:00] live in the freedom. And, oh my gosh, that has so much joy. When we choose that, that I’m just going to be here. Your grace is sufficient enough for now.
It’s not outside this moment. We start trying to control. It’s not outside over here. When we start trying to look here and we get anxious and worried. No, it’s right now. And the Lord has us in this moment for this time for such a time as this, to do his way with us here. And we have the choice to respond, to say, yep, I’m going to live in this freedom. And that’s where your joy and your grace abounds.
And just move me, Lord, show me. I’m going to say it again. God’s not out to dupe us. He’s not trying to hide from us. He wants to see. Us to seek him with his whole heart, but then we need to trust that he’s just going to make that clear. It’s that simple that he will guide us because of our faithfulness in seeking him and loving him. So that’s my wrap up. What else do you have?
Because I was trying to think, I was [00:39:00] like, so freedom is again, the word we’re going for. So what sums that up? And to me, It sums it up when it’s like, I just, I let go of control. It doesn’t mean I don’t keep doing things. Nope. But I let go of control of trying to figure out how I’m going to do things. I let him.
Direct me in how I’m going to do things. I just let go of control. That’s where freedom is when things go a certain way and it’s like, well, it wasn’t in my control anyways. And so it doesn’t bother me that it didn’t go the way. I was expecting like that’s where freedom comes in for me. And that’s, what’s really struck me the last, like two weeks.
And it reminds me like, Back to like my middle school retreats or youth group nights when they did those little skits and it’s like, I’ll be like here, Jesus, here, you can drive the car. You can sit on the stool and it’s like the control stool or something like that. Whatever, every skit does a little different.
And then all of a sudden, like, you know, someone comes on stage and tries to like tempt or distract the main character and they start like booty bumping Jesus off the stool. And he like gladly gets up and moves and then they look over and they’re like, oh, I didn’t realize I did. No, no, no. I want you driving you, you sit back down. [00:40:00] Sorry. I didn’t realize I took over and they just do it over and over. And finally he’s like, I’m not going to keep fighting you for it.
If you’re not going to give it to me, like I’m not, you know? Yeah. That’s our free will. That’s what sticks with me, it’s just like sticks. Sticks with me is like, it’s so much more freeing when I just let him sit there. And, but it, but I relate to the. You don’t even realize sometimes they just shoved him off the stool or whatever. And it’s like, Nope, Nope. I do. I really do want you here, but he, he’s not going to force himself, but he won’t.
Abandon you either, if you, if you, if I, if you keep going back to no, I want you to sit here again and I’m sorry, I pushed you off again, but I want you to come back. Like he’s not going to walk away unless you tell him to walk away. Like I like that. So just keep asking Jesus to come back. Just keep giving him.
The control and then just to walk in the freedom. So much more peaceful. To just let him be. And my goal is to just be able to let him be and sit next to him and watch all those distractions. And those temptations and be like that doesn’t have to bother me Lord, because you’re in control and you’re [00:41:00] driving the car. So I just, yeah.
I can just close my eyes and in the passenger seat and put the seat back and let him drive. Yeah. You know, that’s my goal. We talked about that like a year ago where it’s like, what’s Jesus doing in your life? I think we did this when she was a guest and hers was like, well, right now, All the, all the effort, all the energy I have left is just to lift my arm up and he’s dragging me.
He’s dragging me nicely, but I that’s all the energy I can give him and he’s like, I’ll take it. And I was like, see, he’s like buckling me in the back seat of the little. Like five. Bicycle bicycle, like carrier, like enjoy the view. Stop trying to bike, like just sit down. And I was like, I’m not.
Don’t bike, sit and look, and enjoy like, you know, So that’s what I feel like this is talking about is let him bike and you can just sit in the little tag along and, and enjoy the view. Yeah, you don’t do the work. So I don’t know. So walk in the freedom folks. Embrace it, it’s there for you to just step into.
So, yeah. Amen. I just said that too. I’m [00:42:00] like, Amen
I five grace. Wait, wasn’t there. Wasn’t there, what was the Emily Wilson thing we’re supposed to. A little, oh, the good things. Okay. Sorry. This is, PS. Cause we’re talking about it’s okay to say no to good things. I can’t remember. I supposed to look up the exact gospel thing, but I really liked when people like it’s okay to say no to good things. And that’s hard to understand for me sometimes is there’s Jesus in the gospels. They’re like keep staying in healing and feeding us and teaching us da da da, and he’s like, no, I have to go to this town next.
Like I have to move on to the next town and they’re begging him to stay right. And Emily Wilson talked about that. And like one of her videos or Instagram lives once, and she’s like, it would have been a good thing for him to stay and heal people, but he, he was called to do something else. And so he said no to a good thing. Like it wouldn’t have been bad for him to stay there and to do good works, you know?
But he had to say no to a good thing, because he was called to do something else instead. And that was encouraging for me because I heard that two or three years ago when I was like, I don’t have time to sign up [00:43:00] for this new, like this good thing. But it’s a good thing. I feel like I should do it and I would have totally burnt myself out if I’d signed up.
But I heard that right in the right time where it’s like, okay, This is the Lord telling me no, it’s okay. You don’t have to do this. I’m calling you to something else. Which is also being a student. Cause that was also when I was at college, when that happened. Right. So just, yeah, piggybacks on hearing, allowing ourselves to hear the spirit through other people speak and how timely that can be. And He’ll make sure you hear it. Cause that’s something we did talk about, like not feeling a call either which way.
I I’ve kind of, that’s another thing I’ve learned to abandon. is to be like, Lord, You know how to get my attention? I know something will strike your heart and be like, that’s you telling me? X, Y, Z. He knows how to get your attention. So if your attention is not getting caught, God will find it. He’s not, he’s not hiding.
Stupid. He’s not He is the Lord Almighty he’s. It’s not like, dang, she missed that clue. Right? This is a treasure hunt. Got to figure out a different way to get her attention. Like he knows how to get your attention. So that’s where I get when He is our loving father.
But I’m trying to make decisions. I’m I miss clues so, you know, you know how [00:44:00] very clear you need to be. For me to know that you’re saying, do this. Now if I don’t hear you saying that, then I’m going to move forward. You know? Yes. Oh, I love it. That was a little backtrack. No. That was good. I think it wrapped it up. Well, yes.
So subscribe rate review. Yeah, comment share. All the things, all the jazz, all the jazz moms website. Christina M. Brown.com on Instagram, Christina. Underscore underscore. Underscore underscore brown and then we’re thanks mom. Podcast on Instagram and Facebook group. And. Thanks mom podcast@gmail.com. Yes. So we’re so excited that you’re here please come, keep coming back and we’ll talk to you next time on the thanks mom podcast